Coming out of Hibernation

I feel rejuvenated by the semblance of spring that's made it our way this week.  I stop wearing my coat in March whether or not it makes sense (this means that sometimes I am a walking marshmallow from all of my layers), but this week it actually felt right.  The sun was out for most of the week.  Temperatures were in the 30s and 40s during the day.  Birds are coming back. 

I know that I'm a person affected by weather (slightly), but I think I try to ignore it in the dead of winter.  It seems counter-intuitive to me that I wouldn't want to work on "inside" projects when it's awful outside, so I make lofty goals for myself about what I'll write and read, etc.  The truth is that I rarely want to accomplish much of anything.  I think this is the first time I've been able to fully acknowledge this about myself.  Hopefully next year I can set some different, more relaxing, fun goals to coincide with this time.

I was looking at my New Year's goals post and reflecting this morning.  I've done well on a couple goals I set out to try in January:  sending birthday cards and thank you notes promptly, though I have missed my nephew Logan's 5th birthday and need to remedy this soon.  My novel's first draft is nearly complete (I actually hope to finish it today so it is no longer hanging over my head), and we are taking steps to make our house more home-like.  I'm feeling better about my teaching than I was in January.  So baby steps have been made. 

We were having a conversation the other night with friends about how easy it is to get in an "adult rut" of going to work, watching TV, going to bed, and doing it all over again.  J. and I naturally combat this by not having a TV hooked up to cable (though we did move it into a different room so we could watch the Olympics).  I find that I can spend just as much time mindlessly wasting time on the Internet, though, so I'm not sure my habits are all that different than that pattern on my worst days.  J. is really good at pushing himself to do more with his time, and that is one of the best things he does for me as a partner--he pushes me to do the same. 

I'm excited for what the spring has in store.  As I look back over my 2010 goals and think about which ones I'd like to focus on in March, writing still takes the forefront.  I feel like my birthday card habit is up and running, and my teaching is back in a better place.  I haven't done anything with goal #3, automating my money more and giving more to charity.  But I also know that March will be a big month for home improvement, as we tackle our first wall-painting project. 

My new plan of action/goal on this blog/in life is to set aside time to consider these ideas and write five posts per week--one on each of the categories reflected in the title of the blog.  I have a whole slew of ideas, so we'll see if I can follow through this time. 

Is spring doing anything to shift your mental perspective?

2009 Recap

As this is the third day of 2010, I'm a little slow on the uptake for 2009 recap and goal-setting/resolution making. As a teacher, though, I always feel more impacted by school year deadlines than calendar year deadlines. Since we return to school tomorrow, I guess it's time for me to do my end of the year reflection. I prefer to think of it as a reflection rather than resolution making because I feel pretty satisfied with the direction my life is moving. I don't see any drastic changes that need to occur. As a teacher, I try to build on strengths my students already have, and in the past years, I've improved upon treating myself as well as I treat others. I think it's important to consider the strengths and accomplishments of 2009 as I move into the new year.

2008 into 2009 was a rough time for me. As I dig through my computer archives, I can't find any semblance of goal-setting/reflection during this time last year. I think I was so stuck in a rut of my own thinking that I didn't know what I wanted to accomplish. I had just moved to be with John in August and was feeling dissatisfied with the move and the connections I was making. In January, I'm pretty sure I was on a manic hunt of a location we could move to. One week it would be Denver, the next Portland. I was refusing to make connections and decisions about my professional life because I assumed we'd be leaving in a year.

Somehow, in April of 2009, I was tired of running. John and I both had good jobs where we were. I was beginning to see my teaching improve and I knew that I couldn't continue making improvements if we took off again. I came home from class one night with a sense of clarity I hadn't had all year--that maybe we could stay for a while. When the time came for us to move, it should be because an opportunity was presenting itself to GO somewhere, not because we weren't making the most of our time where we were. To be fair, my mom did bring my attitude problem to my attention over spring break, and I was unable to see it.

When we made the decision to stick around, doors started opening all over the place. John found a home-brew club. I was asked to serve on a district committee to help with new Iowa curriculum. I started a writing group at school. We started seeing the pockets in our community that we had been closed off to before. This was a good thing.

Other big, good things happened in 2009, for which I am very thankful:
1. I finished a sprint triathlon in July 2009.
2. John and I became engaged in August.
3. We bought at house in September, which really allowed us to connect with our community. I was amazed by some of the people that came to the surface in our neighborhood once we held that elusive title of "homeowner."

I also made good baby steps in 2009--continuous goals that I want to keep working toward:
1. I'm beginning to feel more in control of my personal finances. As a teacher in a two-income household, there is plenty of money here that I just need to use more wisely. I began automating lots of financial stuff and feeling more balanced in this area of my life.
2. I started my master's degree which helps with the overall goal of teaching college someday, and fulfills a personal desire to be learning more. I read _Moby Dick_!
3. I am making more conscious choices about my impact on the environment. Our new home allows me to drive much less in daily life (when it's not dangerously cold to be outside), we've set up backyard compost and organized recycling. I'm continuing to think about how my eating choices impact the environment, too. Part of the challenge of the upcoming year will be in how to make our wedding as green as possible.
4. I'm improving with a writing habit. I don't write every day, but I write more frequently. My novel from November isn't finished, but it's coming.
5. I feel that I'm making more grown up choices. What grown-up means to me is less self-centered in my choices. We started buying Kleenexes. I'm trying to send more hand-written thank you notes and birthday cards (a goal for 2010!). This is an area that still needs improvement, but I feel like I'm headed in the right direction.

Whew. That was a long reflection about 2009 (and certainly more for me than an audience!). The best way for me to divide the old year with the new is to take a shower, eat lunch, and dive into goal setting for the new year then.